Of Pinball Machines...

Dear Little People: 

(Because today if you read this I've decided to call you little)     

    At the request of my hordes of readers minus all of my hordes of readers but two or three (which leaves two or three because I don't think many more than pi reading readers read this) there has been a request to post what I call the Dwayne Johnson Rules. So you don't ask why they be called that, it's because if something has hit rock bottom (Dwane Johnson is also known as The Rock. Get it? Get it? Huh? Dooyah? Didja?) then you follow these rules. I don't normally give advice unless it's asked for. This isn't a D.I.Y. manual of how to fix something. It's my place to say whateveriwishinwhateverformatiwishandsuckstoyouifyoudon'tlikeit. However, I suppose I can acquiesce to the request.  

So here be the Dwane Johnson Rules. Follow at your own discretion. (Though if you take advice from me then I think it proves your own discretion has discreetly led you places you'd rather not be)

The Dwayane Johnson Rules(!!!)

 if you find yourself to have made like a pinball machine and been played, so to speak, or if you've been maligned, impugned, victimized, "cheated on", or something like that follow these rules. It's not guaranteed they'll be easy, but they should help you move on. Which is important. 

:: Never be alone with this person causing you distress

:: Don't initiate contact with said distressing stressor. Be polite. Don't be terse. Answer in complete sentences. Don't initiate contact.

:: Focus on other things. Find something to do when your resolve becomes corroded. Stay occupied and productive. 

There you have them. The Dwayne Johnson Rules... YAY! I think I'm done for now. 

     Yours truly,

Me

Introduction

To whom it may concern:

     This is my interweblog (which is the full name for weblog which is the full name for blog). I make no promises of any sort pertaining to future content of this here "blog". I guarantee nothing funny, sad, emotional, or otherwise significant in any way that other "blogs" are significant, nor do I guarantee any kind of consistency in terms of content, writing style, temperament, format, mood, mannerisms, politeness, punctuation, grammar, or taste. Or anything really. Only things consistent with my mood will be on this little "blog". My sole guarantee is general honesty. Or well intentioned lies. Well. Maybe no lies. We'll see. I may lie (or tell the truth) because I know you won't believe the truth even if I tell it to you.                  
     Sometimes I may say things that are not true but are not lies. Those would fall under the category of things I have decided are true on the spur of the moment. They may only be valid for a split second. For example, no one will tell you that I am HRH Scott Christopher Ramone Perseus Machiavelli Bartimaeus Attolia Hyperion Maximus Randall the Great, King of The Known Universe, Prevailing Archduke of the Unknown Universe, Chief Chancellor of Chaos and Afros. It's still true. In the sense that it's not a lie since it's not not true. Sufficiently bewildered? I dearly hope so.
     It is now time for me to go do something else. Because I want to.
    With all due respect, best wishes, and other such blarney,
    Me